Tuesday, November 23, 2010

An audio program is born ...

The labor was relatively enjoyable and easy, with few contractions, even while gestation took longer than expected! Today I'm delighted to announce the delivery of my 15 minute program - Enough to Love - which is ready to find a taker on the airwaves! yipee hooray! You should be able to listen to it here: http://soundcloud.com/yoga4kids/enough-to-love

It has been almost a full year since I started to pour through hours of audio from recorded conversations with over 150 woman across the country who are not having of children of their own. My hope is that this narrative will find its way onto a radio program and ultimately provide inspiration and support for other women who find themselves on (or have chosen) this road less traveled. We are currently among a growing percentage: one out of five 40-44 year old women in the US have not had children (according to the Pew Research Center) - but for some of us it can still feel like a lonely path. Hearing from all these women so uplifted and inspired me and I can truly say I am now able to accept and even embrace the fact that I will never be a mother!

If anyone has ideas about who or where or how to get this in the ears of someone from This American Life or Radio Lab or Soundprints or Living on the Edge or ... let me know!

This Thanksgiving I send special appreciation out to JACK VAD, who donated a ton of time and his incredible expertise to the finer details of sound editing, mastering. layering, tightening things up ... etc, not to mention coaching and an abiding belief in me and this project. What a gift he has been to me! And so many blessings and thanks to all of you, whose voices and contributions are the blood and bones of the project. THANK YOU!

Friday, September 10, 2010

harvest time

Yes indeed. Do you feel the change in the air? the balancing of light?
Time for fruition ...

As I pluck the delicious apples off my tree out back, receive the last offering of pole beans, tomatoes and greens, I'm accepting how, Just like the ripening of fruit, this project is taking time to ripen.

Still though, I'm getting closer to having a final audio program and it is very exciting.

I've sifted through the 28 hours of audio, grabbed the juiciest quotes, whittled them down and down again and am finding the narration to weave them together into a story. I thought this would be a medley of your voices with very little of my own, but have learned that my story is needed to weave them together, and there is a craft to that which I am in process with.

My friend Jack Vad, the sound engineer and producer for the San Francisco Symphony has been fathering the project along with me. We meet Sunday to work on mastering the volume, do more subtle editing than my final cut express program allows, and bring it closer to a program that I can post and pitch and hopefully find a taker for to air on public radio.

This may well be only another phase of the project. I still have so many women I haven't spoken with and want to. There are so many other directions I would like to go in: While I don't want to suggest that I think women without children need nurture and give their love to the earth and its other sentient beings (or ones already here) I feel strongly that the earth needs more love (not more people) and I do want to hear from and focus in on women who are consciously not having children for environmental reasons (Lisa Hymas writes frequent articles on this subject on GRIST - check it out!). I also want to open this up to men, because it is definitely a parenting issue, as much as a mothering issue. And I'd love to speak with more older women about life 10, or 20 or even 30 years later. As well as my younger sisters who are really looking at this for the first time.

I see a much more interactive website in my future with discussion topics and an interactive blog, as well as more travel and circles. Mostly though I look forward to sharing my fist baby - this audio piece.

Stay tuned and thank you so, for your stories and voices. I'm ever grateful.

Caroline

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

where are you offering your love?

In the spirit of inquiry and discussion and the heart of this project, I really want to know where you are giving your love in this world that so needs it. Is your heart open? What makes that happen? the crack, or the expansion?

Lay it on me, my heart is open to you!

Caroline

and from HAFIZ

Even after all this time
The Sun
Never says
To the Earth
"you owe me!"

Look what happens to a love like that,
it lights
the WHOLE sky

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

is love enough?

if so, how do you know?

and when?

and how much?

and who?

do you have to create a being to know?

Thursday, February 25, 2010

We are everywhere

I've spent my free time this first part of 2010 listening to hours of conversation with women in the Bay area, Louisville, KY, Woodland Hills, Ca and up in Seattle, captured on my H2 zoomer, this past fall. Over 20 hours of dialog covering a range of topics around the subject of not having children - from our own mother messages, to when and how we knew this wasn't going to be our path, to what we are doing with our innate desire and need to be creative and share our love. I've whittled the content down to just under 2 hours and will have to half that again if I'm going to produce an hour long program for radio. Ultimately I want women who might feel isolated or alone on this path to be inspired by the richness of insight, to taste the appreciation of freedom these women have, and be supported by the undeniable camaraderie which so naturally presents itself in these circles.

I'm so grateful for the ways women (and some men) have already shown up for this project and the honesty and revealing and listening they have so generously shared. Over one hundred women have expressed interest in being interviewed and while I won't be able to speak with everyone, I do still want to hear from more women who are over 50 years old and were ambivalent about becoming a mother, or may have struggled with the outcome, (vs having always known she didn't want to have kids), and is now on the "other side" and content. I also may need a grant, or a grant writer, to help fund the final production which will likely require more technical skills than I have. I send great gratitude and appreciation to Kiz, who is teaching me about final cut express which enabled me to do the work I've been able to do so far.

I'm excited to pitch a 5-6 minute teaser of the program to This American Life sometime this spring and feel tremendous excitement and joy when I visualize sending this ripple out into the world. We are so lucky to be able to choose whether or not we want to procreate and it is so important to be conscious about that, either way.

Thank you everybody!!